Wednesday, January 17, 2007

No animals were harmed in the making of this wedding

The fate of the vendor...Well, that we're not too sure about.

Before I start, I must say this happened to a wedding planner I know and not to me (although I've had my fair share of animal encounters!)

She was planning a wedding in Acapulco, a beach resort located on the west coast of Mexico. The couple wanted a ceremony at night, overlooking a cliff. They would be illuminated by reflectors and at the moment they kissed, the wedding planner was supposed to open a box and white doves were going to fly out and be dramatically lit up by the powerful reflectors. It all sounds fabulous, right?

Well, the wedding planner looked EVERYWHERE for the darn doves in Acapulco (ah, the lengths we'll go to for our clients) and she finally found a little old man who could provide them. She hired him and got everything set up for the night of the wedding.

Finally, the day of the big event rolled around and she scampered to get everything in place before nightfall. The little old man showed up on schedule and she carefully positioned him and the box of doves behind the altar, where nobody could see him. The sun set and the guests started to arrive. The musicians started to play and the lovely bride walked down the aisle. The couple said their vows, exchanged rings, and got ready for the grand finale.

Meanwhile, the wedding planner was crouched down with the old man, ready to give him the "go ahead" signal so he could open the box and the doves could fly out. As the officiant declared the couple husband and wife and instructed them to kiss, the wedding planner gave the "thumbs up" sign to the little old man. He opened the box, and...

And, nothing. The birds walked around in the box bobbing their heads, making "coo coo" pigeon noises, and pecking at the floor of their cage. In frank desperation, the wedding planner picked up a bird and flung it in the air, just as she had seen it done in the opening ceremony of the Olympics. All the guests saw was a blinded ball of feathers desperately flapping its wings, only to come crashing back down near the box. The wedding planner tried again, to no avail.

She turned to the little old man in frank despair and asked him what was wrong with the birds.

"Nothing," he replied. "It's just that these doves don't fly at night."


Blogger Maya said... That is some funny, funny stuff. What did they say?

1:49 PM  
Blogger Pink Lemonade Diva said...

details, details! I swear, i watch these wedding shows and think that it would be so much fun to be a planner, but I seriously don't know how you do it.

Doves. Night. How can you guess that one?

7:55 AM  
Blogger Baja Babe said...

maya - I never found out the clients' reaction. Hopefully they laughed it off, but you know how some people are...

diva - It's a LOT less glamorous than it looks, especially when you're working with a tight budget, but the bride wants everything she sees in the magazines. (But that's a completely different post :) )

8:35 AM  
Blogger Stacy The Peanut Queen said...



9:12 AM  
Blogger Maya said...

Diva: It is not, I repeat, NOT at all a glam job. Trust us. Things I have done:
-Held out my hand for the brides' gum, just before she walked down the aisle.
-Had a Very. Firm. Conversation. with a Very, Drunk. Bridesmaid who wanted to drive, ended up swiping her keys and more or less shoving her into a taxi.
-Swabbed (expensive garlicy steak, lots of wine, painkillers) sick off a couch in an expensive lobby, in front of lots of people. Half-carried sick-maker outside, had her puke again en route.
-Kept bride, groom and guests from diving in the pool in their pricey wedding garb - by sprinting 50 feet in 4 inch heels.

And the list goes on.

12:41 PM  
Anonymous Karen Shanley said...

LOL! This is hysterical! But, I'm sure, not to the wedding planner...

2:48 PM  
Blogger Baja Babe said...

OMG, Maya...The things we do! I had to scoop day-old food from a trash can into a trash bag the day after the wedding (the caterer's bag ripped and the waiters left the trash in the trashcan without a bag). And that's just one in a million... :)

But today I was called "awesome" by someone looking for information about my services, so I guess it's all worth it in the end!

6:19 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home