What's grosser than gross?
In an effort to make my car presentable when I turn it in at the dealership today, I decided to vacuum it for a change. I have a dog, I live on a dirt road on the side of a mountain in a town where it never rains, and I incessantly cart wedding decorations up and down, so you can imagine the state the interior of the car was in.
As I contorted myself to reach stubborn dog hair caught beneath the driver's seat, the vacuum hose made a strange noise. I retrieved the end of it from under the seat and found a business card being sucked in. When I turned off the machine, the card fell to the floor. I picked it up to find out whose it was.
"The Dolls" Massages
We come to your house
Only for discriminating tastes
(To one side, a graphic image of a scantily clad woman in a sultry pose)
As a slow "Eeeeeeewwwwww..." escaped my lips, my mind went back to the many times when my husband had taken my car because he didn't want to put unnecessary mileage on his.
I'm not sure whether I should feel insulted by his vulgarity or relieved that in one week he will legally and officially be out of my life forever. We didn't have sexual chemistry and he suffered the physical woes of many 50+ men, but I NEVER thought he would stoop that low! Ironically, when I asked for a separation he accused me of cheating. I was appalled that he would even suggest that, but now I realize that he was just projecting himself...
As I contorted myself to reach stubborn dog hair caught beneath the driver's seat, the vacuum hose made a strange noise. I retrieved the end of it from under the seat and found a business card being sucked in. When I turned off the machine, the card fell to the floor. I picked it up to find out whose it was.
"The Dolls" Massages
We come to your house
Only for discriminating tastes
(To one side, a graphic image of a scantily clad woman in a sultry pose)
As a slow "Eeeeeeewwwwww..." escaped my lips, my mind went back to the many times when my husband had taken my car because he didn't want to put unnecessary mileage on his.
I'm not sure whether I should feel insulted by his vulgarity or relieved that in one week he will legally and officially be out of my life forever. We didn't have sexual chemistry and he suffered the physical woes of many 50+ men, but I NEVER thought he would stoop that low! Ironically, when I asked for a separation he accused me of cheating. I was appalled that he would even suggest that, but now I realize that he was just projecting himself...
posted by Baja Babe at 1:22 PM
6 Comments:
Let's not jump to conclusions, now! There are countless ways that card could have ended up under your seat, and very few of them actually involve your husband and a prostitute.
I'm not defending him. I'm simply saying that you can't really make an assumption like that based on a card under your seat.
And congratulations on your impending grand finale. It's weird but I recall the date I left the house, and always will, but I don't really remember the date of finalisation.
Ya, I agree with 2x4. Maybe he never actually went there. Although, where would he get a card like that?
Thanks, mel and 2x4. I'll never know if he actually cheated and I don't think I want to find out, but just the thought of him even considering grossed me out. Maybe I jumped the gun, you're right. :)
2x4: I left on Valentine's day! Now, there's a date one NEVER forgets! :)
I got married on New Year's Eve! Now THAT holiday is bittersweet instead of just fun for the rest of my life. Brilliant idea - mine.
Thank you all for your input. Regardless of what he did, it's now in the past and like all of you I've moved on to better things. :)
I know finding that card in my car would've certainly put the thought of The PK cheating on me into my head!
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